You could be feeling overwhelmed or depressed.  Perhaps you're experiencing anxiety or uncontrolled anger.  Maybe you find yourself constantly fighting with your spouse.   Then someone suggests, "Have you thought about talking to someone?"

Before you take this suggestion negatively, become offended and/or wonder if you are crazy...know something very important....counseling is good for everybody!

Yes, that is exactly right...counseling is and should be for everyone.

Who is without pain in this life?  Family and friends die.   We all are under a lot of stress. Unless you are the one of the very few lucky couples in the world, marriages can face a lot of challenges.  Not to mention the tug of war that parents feel pulled in while making decisions for their children.

So what can counseling offer in these circumstances?

1.  Perspective
In a nut shell, it is sometimes really difficult to see outside of ourselves.  Even if we are introspective, sometimes we just miss that one small way of looking at something differently.  A counselor can be that objective voice that guides us to see our circumstances in a different light.   In the marital game of "you are the problem," a counselor can really help couples see each person's part in their marital problems.

2.  Support
Many people don't have a support system. No spouse. Uninvolved parents.  No friends.  Or, their life may be full of these relationships but they don't feel they can be vulnerable or supported in these relationships.  Counselors can offer the support through encouragement and validation of feelings that is needed.

3. Reparenting
Parents are largely responsible for imparting wisdom to their children.  Unfortunately, if parents don't have wisdom, they don't have it to give to their children.  These children then grow into adults in need of healthier thinking patterns and effective ways to communicate.  Counseling can offer this guidance that helps people to "reparent" themselves in a positive way.

And one final important thought: counseling is Biblical.

Sometimes clients come to our office feeling somewhat embarrassed or ashamed for being in therapy.  They think that somehow they are crazy or inadequate    That's when Proverbs 1:5 becomes really handy...  "A wise man will hear and increase in learning, and a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel." ​

​We’ve all seen them in our facebook newsfeed.  Heartbreaking posts from someone who has lost a loved one or diagnosed with cancer or enduring financial hardship, or painful divorce…the list goes on. And as humans, we deeply desire to comfort these broken hearts through words.  However there is one repeated comment on facebook that we should really reconsider using-  “Let me know if you need anything.”

Too may times, we wait for a struggling person to ask for help. They may need someone to help put laundry away or take their children for a few hours so they can rest. Unfortunately, their mental and physical energy may be too low to be able assign us to these needed tasks. Or they may not want to feel like a burden or even know what they need. That’s why we just have to SHOW UP, look around and offer to do what’s needed without being asked.

Are there some people who are very private and possibly offended by help? Yes. And we want to respect their boundaries.  But who could seriously be angry at a plate of brownies or a pot of soup? My bet is most people will be grateful and feel loved.

Here are some simple ways to help a struggling person in their day-to-day life.

• Offer to drive them to a doctor or counseling appointment

• Take them a meal. It doesn’t have to be fancy.
• Drop off some groceries
• Walk their dog
• Take their kids for a few hours
• Cut their grass or weed flower beds
• Fold laundry
• Clean dishes in their sink
• Offer to run errands for them
• Drop off a cup of their favorite coffee
• Make a fruit and veggie tray for their kids